Anxiety and why we need to talk about it?

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. It’s just a personal opinion and my effort to shed light on a topic which needs to be discussed.

Anxiety and Depression discussion in India is an understatement. We don’t discuss it like we do other diseases, especially the older generation. In India, mental health is a taboo. If you say, I have health issues that deals with brain and mind, or I am under depression or I am seeing a Psychiatrist, we are immediately labelled as ‘Pagal’ (Mad). Thus, we choose to ignore discussing such topics, or even worse, we ignore to go to a consultant as well, or simply just hide it. However, ignorance is not always bliss.

A recent report by WHO says India is one of the most affected countries in the world. The report conducted for NCMH (National Care of Medical Health) states that atleast 6.5% of the Indian population suffers from mental health disorder. Majority of the patients are young teenagers.

The stigma of having an anxiety disorder is real and it needs to stop.

Anxiety if not handled at the correct hour can lead you to depression, bipolar disorder, multiple personalities and many grievous problems.

So what exactly happens in Anxiety and how to know that you are suffering from it?

Let me start with an example:

I have always been an over thinker and an emotional person. I take things a little too seriously and close to my heart. I could imagine never how overthinking could kill me slowly. I first experienced a pain on my left chest while crying in 2013. I ignored it, thinking that it must be gas.because I had not eaten. It then happened again after two-three months, when I was sad. It then started frequently, if I am sad I would experience that pain. It was until 2017, the pain started to extend from my chest to the left hand. By 2018 early, it was unbearable. I had to stop crying so as to reduce the intensity of pain and finally the time came. I experienced my first Panic Attack in July 2018. It was my worst experience ever. I was breathless, my BP went high, I felt I had a cardiac arrest (and trust me when I say this), my heartbeat increased, and I almost fainted. It was bad. I felt so a weak from Inside for the next two days. Everyone around me was scared, they thought my heart was unhealthy. I undergo multiple checkups and found my heart completely fine. On discussing the symptoms, the doctors recommended me to consult a Psychiatrist.

I normally would complain about multiple health issues like diarrhoea, muscle twitches, zero bladder control, getting tired easily, high BP, increased heart rate, becoming anti-social, left chest and hand ache, excessive sweating, fearfulness, poor concentration, excessive worrying and a few more. They were all so normal that I never thought it was all happening because of this. I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). Doctors were not happy to see how I had managed to ignore all of this for so long. I was asked to take rest and zero stress. I was recommended a tons of medicine. I was in shock and upset. I took a few decisions. I left my job, joined a gym and focused only on myself. I wanted to avoid taking medicines. I changed my eating habit and normal routine. I got multiple sessions in between and eventually have improved a lot.

Now I know how to handle stress and such situations.

If you come around me, I am so vocal and talkative, but I would never discuss how affected I was or am always. Now, I do. I share it with my people and it has helped me for good. My parents would still deny that I suffered from something like this.

END.

So all my dear readers, please don’t ignore even a tiniest such signal and get checked up at the drop of a hat. Sought help with your friends and family. Don’t Hestiate!

Talk about it and spread awareness. Lately, we have seen a few initiatives around, for example, the LIVE LOVE LAUGH foundation by Deepika Padukone. They are prompt and helpful. I have contacted them whenever needed, and they would listen to all I have to say. India and other countries are still battling with this social stigma. We need to encourage people around us to speak and share. It’s time to get out of the closet and TALK.

Tips I would give from my experience:

  1. Always keep a check on your daily habits. It will help you trace the trigger.
  2. Workout/Run/Yoga. Take care of your health and try to eat clean. Do at least 3-5 times a week.
  3. Avoid foods that spur anxiety. For example Coffee, Alcohol, and Sugar for starters. The list is long.
  4. Avoid things that trigger you for example dark and sad movies or web series. It does wonders.
  5. Try not to be alone. Stay around people.

These are a few changes I had brought in me and have seen the changes. It’s Positive.

Thanks to all of you, who have made it till here. People wondering were was I for all these months, well now you know! All questions answered.

If you wish to talk to me and share your story or fears you can always mail me at shso94929@gmail.com or talk to me over the phone. I would surely help you reach the right place.

Love Love!

See you guys soon!

Follow me on Instagram @thecrazywomansays

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A letter to my mother!

Dear Mummy,

I don’t remember the last time you didn’t panic when I told you I am not feeling well. If you were not around me, I couldn’t have completed my school ever. Your “Uthhh jaaaaa….School Nahi Jana??” (“Get Up, Don’t you have school to attend?), is still registered in my mind. The daily drill that started with switching off the fan and ended at “Beta, Tiffin kha lena..” (“Dear, eat the food for sure”) I know we fight a lot, we have our disagreements, but where did I learn all this? Who was my teacher? You are the strongest my mom; you always taught me to take my stand, do what is correct, and never be off guard. You taught me how to speak, walk, eat and all the essential etiquettes. You have no idea how much I love ditching the chopsticks and eating noodles with the fork when I am with you.
When I bruised my knees while playing, you got my first aid done, gave me medicines and injections and a few days later, beat me up over the same. Reason: I should have been careful. Why so innocent Ma? You have in the past, cooked all my favourite foods, and taught me to do the same. Today, I proudly cook your recipes and my friends go wow on tasting them!!

From the first day to my school till today, It’s tough for me to leave you every time. I don’t tell you often, but I miss you too much. Anyone cannot fill your absence. Mum, it’s always fun to sit with you and talk nonsense, while you give that heavenly champi to me. I love it when you gossip about the other aunties. Our hourly phone calls, discussing your fav characters from serials, is unbeatable. I love it when you call me to ask your Whatsapp, Facebook and Instagram issues. I love it how you go cray-cray for burgers, pizzas, french fries and all that junk.

Our fights have many times started over a pizza slice, have continued to me asking you to change your thinking and ended at you throwing one of the household stuff on my face. Gosh, I love God for giving me, you!

Mummy, you are the best, you are the chef, the babysitter, family caretaker, finance manager, counsellor, teacher, advisor. You are cute, tough, lovable, naïve yet experienced. You are the Champion, the Pillar. You have kept us all together. Today, what we are, who we are, we owe it to you, I owe it to you.

Every day can be a mother’s day, but this day is just a little extra special.

In no words, I can define my infinite love and respect for you.

Love You!

The Touch Of Your Love – A Short Poem

I wake up, my eyes flickering,
sunlight gleaming, on to my face,
I twinkle, my face crease,
I turn and wrap my self under that satin sheet,
I slide in my hands on to my body,
running continuously from my waist to the breasts,
it’s the touch of your love that I feel,
my lips twitch, and eyes flutter,
a cold wind flicked my bare shoulders, as my body shivers,
It’s the touch of your love that gives me the chills.
I look outside the window, sunkissed, I soak in the heat,
my hair in a tangled mess, and the heart skipping its beat.
My stomach tickles by the idea of you, it’s been so long,
but still anew.
It’s the touch of your love that I feel myself.
As I caress my body and fondle my soul,
it’s the touch of your love that I believe in love!

-sonali

 

Sketch By Me, Written By Me.

For more updates follow me on Instagram @thecrazywomansays

Dear Woman – Never Stop

Happy Women’s Day All You Ladies out there! This women’s day I am here to share a message with all of you. The message is to NEVER STOP.

  • Never Stop moving forward.
  • Never Stop because someone else wants you to.
  • Never Stop loving yourself.
  • Never Stop they think you can’t.
  • Never Stop taking your own stand.
  • Never Stop embracing yourself for who you are.
  • Never Stop being the best version of you.
  • Never Stop because you don’t see a solution.

Always Stay Healthy and Fit, Eat Fine and Laugh like there is no Tomorrow.

Do what makes you feel YOU, Just Breathe.

A while ago I created four posts thread on my Instagram wall called #NeverStop Series.

  1. Don’t Let Anyone Ever Dull Your Sparkle. (1/5)

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2. Love Your Body and Teach Your Mind to Respect it. Stay Comfortable in Your Own Skin. (2/5)

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3. I am who I am. Not who you think I am. Not who you want me to be. I am me. (3/5)

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4. “I am under no obligation to make sense to you. Always stay fierce!” (4/5)

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5. To the divine mischievous spark in you.. (5/5)

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Happy Women’s Day!! Cheers to all the beautiful ladies!! Love Love!

Hair and Makeup Artist – Self and Photography – Self

For more updates follow me on Instagram @thecrazywomansays

My Goa Trip with my Parents

“Get the beer bottles and your bucket list. For god’s sake, it’s Goa.” Stop, right there! Yes, you heard me right. The above sentence is something you hear from people when the adrenaline rush is on some other level.

Unlike everyone else, my Goa trip started something like this- ” Peripauna Papaji, Peripauna Mummyji! Kaise ho? Kuch doodh tey lassi laun?” 😂

Yes, I went for a Goa trip, and Yes, I went with my parents. So let’s get this straight, in this blog you ain’t getting any beer rates and port wine details. But I got some awesome clicks 🙂 (scroll below to see)

Our Goa trip was 3 Days 4 Nights long. And it was good.
Coming to the point, let me help you go through the deets one by one.

What to do (If you are on a budget) –

1. Hire Scooty or Bikes, Avoid Taxis and Auto.
2. Stay at homestays or at the beach,😂 Avoid Hotels.
3. Eat at local restaurants and eatery joints, Avoid Eating at beach shacks.
4. Don’t go shopping for ‘The Goa Clothes’, You will get plenty of shops nearby beaches, they are affordable and cheap.

Well, if you are not on a budget, consider the avoid part. 😃

What I Observed –

1. People are kind and genuine. Helpful and Cute.
2. No theft! Leave your stuff at point A and come back an hour or later, only to see your stuff still lying at point A.
3. Except for the shack, food joints are cheap in price.
4. Variety of Fish Dishes.
5. Reasonable Beer Prices.
6. Lots of Tattoo Parlour at nominal rates.
7. Tittoo’s Lane is a must go after Evening. It’s beautiful. You will find many cafes, Jewellery Shops (having the fantastic collection) and Dream Catcher Shops.
8. It’s hot in the noon, so prefer going out after 3 in the noon and stay up late.
9. Beaches are clean.

There are many beaches where you can go to Calangute, Arambol, Baga, Vagator and more. We visited all the beaches. I loved Arambol and Vagator as they were less crowded. Calangute and Baga were crowded, but it was fun there too.

I cannot take the opportunity to write in detail because we just visited all the beaches rather than sitting in one place.

We also visited two forts, you must visit them for some top and serene view of the infinity beaches. Good location for Photography!

We hired a taxi who charged us INR 2100/- from morning 7AM to Evening 7 PM, and INR 200/- per hour afterwards.

If you are planning to go and enjoy on Cruise, I suggest you Deltin Royale Cruise. Rest all are wastage of time and money.

I don’t have my budget list because I was not spending. :p

Here are some of the images from my Haridwar Trip, Oops I mean Goa Trip:

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That’s all for today guys! Hope to see you all soon! Love Love!

For more updates follow me on Instagram @thecrazywomansays

MUST READ – A LETTER TO ALL THOSE WHO ARE HUMANS

How easy is it to torture someone? How easy is it to blackmail someone? How easy is it to make a person’s life hell? How easy is it to take advantage of someone’s situation? To harass someone? To hit someone? To leak someone’s personal information?

VERY EASY I Guess!

Every day we come across various cases of violence – mental or physical. The victim of such circumstances can be a girl, boy, man or a woman.

Recently, I met someone who was a constant bully of home violence. She was beaten up on a regular basis. She is not allowed to step outside without permission. He’s an Insecure Pig.

Another one got choked by a man for taking a stand for herself and her life. He’s on a heartbreak cycle.

One more is getting harassed by a man. This man keeps uploading her private images to the great world wide web. And he thinks he is brilliant. He’s on a revenge cycle.

One girl was forced into prostitution. He was on some other trip.

Let me clear, here by chance all the victims are women, but I have seen men victims too.

Also, this letter does not intend to hurt anyone’s feeling, emotions, culture, cast, creed, nor does it offend any particular gender.

While I came across all of the above cases, the victims had one thing in common – they were being weak. They cried when they were saying what happened/ is happening to them.

I am not saying crying is bad. Please go ahead and vent it all out. But do not self-pity, do not think that you are weak, do not feel that no one will understand, do not believe that you cannot take a step, do not think that there is no door to get out of this.

My dear victim,

I pity your situation. I feel bad. I want to take you out of that position. But I and my actions will help you out only if, you take your stand. I know it takes a lot of guts to face the family, friends and the world and to love oneself. But if there is anyone who can help you at an initial stage is YOU.

So cutting it short, please take stand for yourself, rest will follow. Sitting and crying over your miserable life won’t help anyone. Rather it will give the satan – more courage to continuing doing such stuff.

My Dear Wrongdoer/Sinner,

Yes, you got me right if you are reading this. If you beat someone up, or harass anyone or continuously do something that’s against the law. It’s wrong and unlawful. You are satan. You might be an insecure pig, or a person out on revenge, or heartbroken, or any x y z.. nothing ever gives you right to intrude and invade and mentally or physically harass someone. You do such things and then try to justify your actions. Trust me it’s of no use.

This is an open letter to all of you out there. Please take stand for yourself. It’s high time you, me and everyone else to stand for someone who needs it and for yourself. Wheather you know or do not know a person it doesn’t matter, helping someone out in a time of misery won’t make you feel bad. Stop thinking about how to save your ass, instead let’s all get together and take action against such pigs.

Here I am not asking you to please like or share this post. I request you all to spread this word. To not let anyone be a victim of violence and harassment. Some people need a push to gather courage. Be that push!

Motivation Behind This Letter: The one with the revenge feels. A jerk who has been continuously creating a fake Instagram profile under someone’s name and misusing/mishandling the account. And we are taking a stand against this one. WILL YOU?